4 Years ago today... by Mike Muncey June 8, 1999

Four years ago today we got "the call"... it was a Thursday. They said, "Bring your husband to the 8:30 AM appointment on Monday". Sue called me to tell me... she was pretty upset. Rather than waiting all weekend until Monday, we called back and insisted that the doctor see us the next day-- Friday.

That was the beginning of this bizarre journey. Sue had been in for a gyno exam, and having that weird ugly freckle removed seemed like such an afterthought. That Friday we went in together after a sleepless night full of concerns-- the freckle never crossed our minds as an issue.

When the doctor told us that the "freckle" was a melanoma we were momentarily relieved that the gyno results were okay-- we had never heard of melanoma. We were completely floored that this "skin cancer", this stupid little ugly dark "freckle" that we ignored for perhaps 2 years, was "life threatening". He told us that they didn't get it as early as they would have liked. That at Sue's "stage" morbidity could be as high as 30% in 5 years. Sue was only 29. Our kids were only 5 and 2. And to add insult to injury, we found out that our cameras (video and 35mm) had been stolen with all of the pics of our 2- year-old's b-day.

Initially things were very busy. Research, getting referrals to doctors. Scaring myself to death by confusing Clark's 4 with Stage 4. Fighting the HMO for a referral to an oncologist. Facing the reality that the initially recommended groin dissection could end Sue's ability to ski.

Friends make a big difference. One whose son had/has leukemia (still in full remission) gave me the first taste of what a powerful tool the internet can be. Through that, we learned about a cutting-edge new treatment-- Sentinel Node Biopsy. Now, a standard treatment, in 1995 it was brand new. Sue was one of the first to have it done. Then it was on to JWCI for consultation and vaccine therapy. IFN wasn't approved yet and we liked the close follow-up and lack of side- effects. We still have one more year to go on that trial.

The first two months were at such a frantic pace that it almost kept us distracted. Constant trips to Santa Monica for vaccine and local labs for blood tests and X-rays. I think the second year was emotionally the hardest. Having to stretch from monthly appointments that provided reassurance to every 3 months. That first 3 month stretch seemed like an eternity. But after a few trips, we adjusted to the new schedule.

Along the way we have lost friends-- far too many. Many of my original friends from MPIP are gone. And we have met others that are still doing well. This disease is unpredictable-- you never really become "cured" because there is always a risk of recurrence. But at some point it doesn't feel like you "have cancer" either-- especially if you aren't suffering any side- effects of treatment. At least the nightmares are far between now.

Life is pretty normal now, but I guess the experience has to change you. I lecture people about using sunscreen and avoiding tanning beds. I've been glad to be there for the people, my friends on MPIP, who I've discussed treatment options with. I know that you will always be here for me too. I'm so thankful that at 4 years everything is still going so well for us.

I don't read or post to MPIP nearly as much as I used to, but I'll always check-in from time to time. And as always, you are always welcome to send me e-mail. Best of luck to everyone who is fighting this disease!